The names here may or may not reflect the person’s real name. If someone wants to remain unknown, we will choose a different name for that person’s story. The goal is to help people, and anonymity is a valid personal choice for contributors. I will use a person’s name only if they give permission to do so.
This week I am pleased to share another of my own stories.
Here is Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 15
Up to now, I have been sharing my story and the stories of others with their issues regarding weight. That means if you are reading this week’s story, and have been since I started writing, you know that I am struggling. Sometimes week to week other times day to day, but it could literally be bite to bite. I wake up thinking about food. I go to bed thinking about how tired I am or am not, and this is usually related to what I ate that day. When I dream about food, it wakes me up to go test my blood sugar. If it is OK, then it was just a dream. Sometimes it is my body telling me that I need to get a glass of juice.
Today was no different than any other Wednesday. I got up, went to work, went to Zumba, and then I came home. Where I knew I had meat in the fridge, both cooked and ready to be cooked, but I could not bring myself to start making a healthy meal. I wanted the easy way out. I sent an SOS to my husband for fast food. I was tired when I got home today. Bone tired. I decided that I would nap until he arrived home.
Sometimes it is the only way to accomplish everything that you need to do, taking the easy way. But taking the easy way is not the healthy way to live. I am living proof of that. The easy way is not the path less travelled. The easy way is the way to childhood obesity and the epidemic that I happen to be a statistic of, the Type 2 Diabetes crisis that is blowing up all over the world right now. If you continually choose the easy meal, the easy snacks, the sugar, the preservatives, the chemicals and the toxins you will not live a healthy life. It isn’t possible. It’s called junk food for a reason.
What is the alternative? Hard work. If you put in the time and effort into yourself, it will pay off. It doesn’t matter if you stray from the path when life happens. What matters is that you value yourself enough to go back to the path you have chosen to follow because you strive towards living a healthier lifestyle. There are always going to be days when you are too tired to cook. I have had days where I am so tired and hungry that I can’t even decide which restaurant I want to go to. The main thing is that I don’t give up forever. I keep trying. I keep pushing myself to do better. And I keep celebrating every little success along the way.
I cannot stress the importance of planning ahead and prep cooking enough. If I had made that casserole last night, I would have had supper planned, and this helps me to make healthy choices. Sometimes I am too busy. I planned my lunch today but found I was very cold at work, so I bought soup and BBQ chips to give my circulation a little kick in the pants with some mild spices. Would I do that again tomorrow? Not unless I felt the exact same way I did today. I am usually bundled up in layers at work, but there are limits to what I am able to wear and what they will allow me to wear to stay warm at my desk. Today I was maxed out on layers, and still cold. I did what I needed to do to adapt to the day. It worked. Tomorrow may be a different story, yesterday I found it a little cold, but tolerable. Today I could not get warmed up. This is a side effect of having thyroid disease, sometimes I am cold when I should be warm.
When I am out of ideas for lunch, I plan scrambled eggs and cheese. I can cook it in the microwave, and I can eat vegetables with it. I almost made that for lunch today, but I changed my mind and made good old PB&J on sprouted bread. I am not the biggest fan of this sandwich, so I am using regular peanut butter. I bought the kind that has no sugar, which must be stored in the fridge. It was left too long and dried out. So for the few times that I make it, I am using regular peanut butter. When I decide to make something that has a need for peanut butter that is on plan, I will buy more that is made with just peanuts and salt. I use sugar-free jam. The sprouted bread is on plan. 2 out of 3 ain’t bad, to quote a song by Meatloaf. I ate my sandwich after Zumba class, to hold me over until the fast food was here to eat.
If you are struggling like me, then neither of us is alone. It can be a solitary journey if you are hiding behind closed doors or sneaking around to feed the monster inside. I am calling it what it is. A monster that is obsessed with food, and thrives off of sugar. It does not mean that I am a monster. It does mean that I have to fight it. The harder I fight, the smaller it will be. It will reflect on the outside what is happening on the inside. And that is where the beauty hides. The beauty that is inside all of us needs to be nurtured and loved. It will flourish and bloom if we give it the attention that it deserves. When this happens, you start to glow from the inside out, and the monster shrinks inside. Just as the monster scares your inner beauty, the glow from that inner beauty outshines the monster if we let it. As someone who loves to sparkle and shine, I am going to focus on that for the next week, and see where it takes me.
Trust Your Gut is my weekly series that I have decided to publish on Thursdays. I think it is time to I gave it a hashtag of its own. Help me to get the word out to other people that may need to read these stories and know that they are not alone. Help me to reach out to other people that want to help by sharing their own stories. All it takes is an idea to create something big that matters and can help people. I am starting that now.
Together we can help people, just like you and me.
#TrustYourGutThursday and #TYGT